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/int/ - certified time wasters

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 No.16566

IMG_5040.JPG (37.02 KB, 194x259)

Willkommen!

 No.16567

And what are we supposed to be doing in this thread?
You have to tell me what I am supposed to do.

 No.16568 KONTRA

>>16567
>You have to tell me what I am supposed to do.
That's very German.

 No.16569

m9NEkR5faD-4.png (26.75 KB, 300x250)

>>16567
>You have to tell me what I am supposed to do.

Lesson 1.
The German needs his instructions or he can not function.

 No.16570 KONTRA

kzukzuk.png (3.05 KB, 307x73)

>>16569
>>16568
You stole my post

 No.16572 KONTRA

>>16568
>>16569
That post popped into my mind as well, but someonetwo else was faster :D

 No.16573

Jokes aside, did you have an idea what to do here, OP?

 No.16574 KONTRA

>>16573
No. I just liked the idea and went ahead with it.

 No.16576

What's one your favorite German car brand and car models. Why? I'll go first.

The Mercedes Benz 202 C-Class. It's not my absolute favorite but I really like the rear design and the edges. During my childhood I once purchased a miniature model of the 202 C-Class in a pastel yellow color for H0 scale miniature train


>>16573
I was thinking about a Germany thread that is about Germans and German culture. It's like the sino thread I guess.

 No.16577

>>16574
Der absolute Verrücktmann.

 No.16578

>>16576
>Mercedes-Benz_W202
Whenever I think of "THE" Mercedes (not that it happens often, but still) its predecessor, apparently called W201 internationally, is what comes to mind. That might be showing my age.

I think a now long dead uncle had one.

 No.16579 KONTRA

>>16578
I know that's not answering the question, but I just had to say it.

 No.16580

BMW_E30_front2_20080127.jpg (363.37 KB, 1530x903)

>>16578
Oh, that is a very fine car, it's just the usual pick so I went with the successor. At the moment it is a very much thought after "old timer". Back when it was about to become a young timer I was dreaming about purchasing one after I did get my driver's license.

 No.16581

>>16580
My father drove a W201 Combi in the 90s btw, not sure if he was leasing, bought it himself or got it from the business he was working for. I remember we kids sometimes were seated in the trunk when others were with us. Crazy. Who would do it like that these days?

 No.16584

That's "cars" covered. Now we need
Beer
Sausages
Bread
Football

 No.16585

>>16584
(coarse) Bratwurst, Currywurst > rest

I hardly know German sausages, Only Weißwurst comes to mind

 No.16586

>>16584
In honor of our OP, i want to mention that the hungarians are very good at making sausages.

 No.16587

>>16585
>(coarse)
For a second I thought you were reading the stage directions out loud.

 No.16598

>>16581
> Who would do it like that
when i was in scouts Pfadfinder we transported like 8 to 10 kids (was one of the kids) with a small golf - sometimes even more.
It was an actual competition on "how many can you transport" :D

 No.16601 KONTRA

>>16570
Amazing things are happening on Ernstchan.

 No.16604


 No.16605 KONTRA

>>16604
maybe for some context:
the word "barbarian" was coined because the romans only understood "ba ba ba". a few other words used in this song can also be tracked down to this little fun fact.

> 1.jpg

> Sind wir noch das Volk der Dichter und Denker?
ba ba ba?

 No.16606 KONTRA

>>16605
You heard that somewhere, but you remembered it wrong. The term was used by ancient greeks first, and the Romans were very much included. If you want to be a smartass, do it right. Maybe for some context.

>>16604
I did not even click, this isn't funny.

 No.16607 KONTRA

>>16606
> ancient greek
> latin
both dead languages; close enough.
https://meta.wikimedia.org/wiki/Cunningham%27s_Law

> I did not even click, this isn't funny.

how can you know without clicking?

 No.16610

>>16607
>how can you know without clicking?
Aspect ratio under 1. Frankly, I expected unfunny tiktok posting much earlier, were you away or something?

t. other Ernst

 No.16611 KONTRA

>>16607
> I said it wrong on purpose to get the right answer xd lol I'm so smart
How did you know it was wrong, fucking retard?

> and it doesn't even matter

It was relevant enough for you to blurry it out without anyone asking, wasn't it?

 No.16613 KONTRA

mgler.mp4 (2.15 MB, 576x1024)

>>16610
It's somebody else. I don't post Tiktoks that are intended to be funny.

 No.16614

Routine question: what's happening in /b/?

 No.16615 KONTRA

>>16614
Discussions of food, horticulture and cycling.

 No.16617

>>16611
...
>>16604, >>16605 and >>16607 was all me.
the copy&paste youtube shorts comment from >>16605 was just pasted as an after-thought, to, yes, let some autistic Ernst correct it in case it is wrong.

i didn't care enough to look it up myself, hence the
> both dead languages; close enough.
the link towards cunningham's law was just as a "kek, it turned out to be right - yet again."

> fucking retard

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological_projection

>>16614
pretty much >>16615 plus porn, anime and anime-porn. also tea.
especially tea.
and a little more radio compared to /int/

 No.16618 KONTRA

oh, and i posted barbaras rhabarberbar barbarian beard baber beers because of
https://www.youtube.com/source/Rpa4IDC17bw/shorts?bp=8gVCCjYSJwoLUnBhNElEQzE3YncSC1JwYTRJREMxN2J3GgtScGE0SURDMTdidxoLUnBhNElEQzE3Ynco7fu3r92N-usN and https://www.tiktok.com/music/Barbaras-Rhabarberbar-7313913166055541537

...pretty much the biggest recent international german viral thingy... by a landslide.

!!ARRREEEE YOU REEEAAAADYYYYY FOR PART TWOOOO?!!
you gonna get it anyway

 No.16619 KONTRA

>>16618
* bar
sry, forgot that - also am retarded and can't remember how to shout on ec. should i goto >>>/test/ and come back with a refreshed memory?

 No.16620

>>16614
No idea, way too low-briw for me

 No.16860

https://t.me/insect_life/21234
In twitter migrant in Germany wrote that he flushed the toilet at 11PM and neighbors called police on him for that. Liberals raged at him, saying that he's wild barbarian, who doesn't understand what civilization and order are.

German Ernst, do you find it acceptable to flush the toilet at night? Do you approve calling police because of that?

 No.16861 KONTRA

>>16860
I roomed with a girl who didn't flush at night. I prefer flushing sounds at 11:00pm to stale urine at 07:00am, but that dispute was never settled.

 No.16862

bnYHuXI.png (119.91 KB, 1000x1434)

>>16860
Flushing time is 08:00 - 12:00 and 15:00 to 21:00.

 No.16869

>>16860
Plot twist: It was not the flushing, but the earraping volume techno he had been blasting all evening.

 No.16870 KONTRA

>>16869
immigrant in Germany? It was the live transmission from some Mosque in Taka-Tuka-land, certainly not Tekno.

 No.16871 KONTRA

>>16870
He's Russian or Ukrainian or something like that. It was probably Dota 2 match translation.

 No.16872

>>16870 see >>16871
It was DEFINITELY loud techno.

 No.16873

a5eO_aFb55XpAbC_.mp4 (3.07 MB, 576x1024)


 No.16875 KONTRA

>>16873
Let me guess, it's Ausländer raus on L'amour tojours?

 No.16876 KONTRA

>>16875
No it actually doesn't have the "lyrics"

 No.16877

1592895879-012.mp4 (587.49 KB, 480x264)

Pornomonolog_Garten.webm (2.38 MB, 320x240)

>>16873
>unfunny vertical video, apparently from one of the big äpps
>weebshit
>no comment, explanation or any more than "no" effort
Hungary, are you trying to emulate the other german? You really shouldn't do that, you can do better.

Fun fact: Back on the KC there were wordfilters where "Keinbernd" was filtered to, among other things, "Ausländer".
So, provided we want to stay the imageboard authority on male-female relations (with the people writing the longest posts naturally knowing the least about relationships), we should adopt this. So, when you say "Ausländers raus" you would actually say "Keinbernds raus".
Of course with the silly and lame current wordfilter of "Keinbernd" to "KeinNeuernst" this won't work.

Have some actual German humor instead.

 No.17033

gegen_merkel.mp4 (3.69 MB, 576x1024)


 No.19255

photo_2024-08-20_10-35-37.jpg (128.04 KB, 786x1280)

photo_2024-08-20_10-35-37(1).jpg (129.99 KB, 786x1280)

photo_2024-01-28_20-28-57.jpg (119.51 KB, 1086x1082)

photo_2024-01-28_20-28-57(1).jpg (102.43 KB, 1086x1082)

Migrants complaining about life in Germany. On a second screen there is a mistranslation, should be "in the modern history"

Is it real?

 No.19256 KONTRA

>>19255
First one has proper reasons, second one - no idea where the idea of reliable public transport in Germany comes from, people have been making fun of the Bahn for decades for being shit. Plus, it's Berlin, the closest thing we have to soviet Russia in terms of general state of everything, except people don't speak the same language.

 No.19257

>>19256
>Berlin, the closest thing we have to soviet Russia in terms of general state of everything
Are you still butthurt about Berlin becoming the capital again?

 No.19259

>>19257
No, I am just describing Berlin as what it is, and I didn't want to use the words of a weighty berlinian blogger and say "failed state".

 No.19261

>>19259
I live in Berlin and know it's not like you describe it. Weirdly all the hate for Berlin comes from people who don't actually live there, hmmm...

 No.19262

>>19261
For how not shit you claim it is you are surprisingly defensive here.
But Berlin is even worse with its unwarranted self-importance than Frankfurt whose highest culinary achievement is quark with grass.
Maybe you want to repeat those elections?
Or in general, fix your politicans like Giffey or Kalayci.
Or, if we're at that, why don't you move to one of those clan neighborhoods and write your same post again?
Or maybe reconsider if it's cool to be poor, but sexy.
Or build an airport for a sane amount of money?
Or finish the work on that tram line that has been out of order for how many years?
That's just from the top of my head, but with a few minutes of googling I might bring up more.
But I guess if you yourself smell like shit everything else smells normal to you.

So watch out friend, you might overdose on that copium.

 No.19267

>>19256
> First one has proper reasons
Which ones?

 No.19279

>>19267
It's not access to "the water". You can jump into the river just fine. It's access to the private propery (the pier).

 No.19282

>>19267
I'd suppose two things. If you own anything, you are responsible for it. In case of that pier, you bet the following things would happen:

1. Youths partying and leaving the place a mess - and the cleanup will be your job
2. One of those youths getting piss drunk, falling into the river and drown, and subsequently you getting sued by whining parents, because you killed their baby by neglecting security on your property. Of course it can't be that it was their own fault, their baby is dead and now they demand justice, someone has to suffer for it. You know, like those people burning their throats with McDonalds coffee, because there was no warning sign there that it is hot.

 No.19283

>>19279
> private property
And how ist that pier private property? It's just to fuck with anyone else. No one but a German could grasp this.

 No.19284

>>19282
So maybe not built a putter if it's too risky for you? How do you even get to own the ground that pier is on? Someone just bought a fence, set it up, built a pet and then it's his private property or what?

 No.19285 KONTRA

>>19267
It has no proper reasons. It is just German bullshit in Germany.

 No.19290

>>19282
>1. Youths partying and leaving the place a mess - and the cleanup will be your job
Youths or foreigners. Foreigners just litter everywhere and trash everything.

 No.19292

>>19290
Those big festivals in Germany must have been frequented by refugees only. I heard the German government pays refugees to make them go to Wacken, Rock am Ring, Fusion and all the other major festivals. No Germans are allowed anymore. So sad what happened to this country.

 No.19293 KONTRA

>>19292
> It's teens, not foreigners!

t. Omas gegen rechts

You know that the average person at those festivals is like 45, right?

 No.19300 KONTRA

>>19293
The average refugee is above 45?

 No.19318 KONTRA

>>19300
t. pulls "statistics" out of his ass

 No.19343

>>19290
Speaking about foreigners...

>>19256
> no idea where the idea of reliable public transport in Germany comes from
1) Germany is a 1-st world country with "Ordnung" stereotype.
2) Liberals tend to idealize west. Like vatniks, most of them don't speak foreign languages and have never been abroad except as tourists, so the level of affordable delusion is big. You can believe about Germans eating squirrels from hunger or about literal Heaven on Earth in Germany, both will do.

 No.19390

>>19343
> Ordnung
1. We have always done it that way
2. We have never done it that way
3. Where would that get us?

is the extent of German Ordnung. Public transport in Germany is bad, it grows worse year by year, it will not get better, ever.

There are lots of other things in Germany this applies to, like housing, 'knife crime', police violence, taxes, etc.

 No.19391

We really have a real estate crisis. Rostock is now about as affordable as Stuttgart. (Not.)

Used to be a Apartment in Toitenwinkel or Lichtenhagen was < 100k. I always dreamed of living on the shore. Now, I can dream of live in nether-lower-Frankonia, Coburg or some fucking shit.

 No.19395

>>19391
Buying apartments is a bad idea anyway, because anything pertaining to the house still has to be decided by the homeowner association.

 No.19397

Chad_opinion.jpeg (29.81 KB, 682x282)

>>19391
>I always dreamed of living on the shore

Just rent an apartment and live on the shore? You are making up excuses.

 No.21317




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